Meet your Meat

We woke after a sub-par sleep in Lubbock to the news that it was -4 degrees celcius outside. This was a bit of a shock after the lovely high 20's temperatures we enjoyed the previous day in San Antonio. We pulled into a cafe on the main drag called Pancake House as judging by the cars in front it seemed popular. The decor could be described as slightly creepy-religious with the specials board reading "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus". With none of  us in the mood for the 3 saviour special we ordered a spread of omletes, bacon, buttermilk pancakes, turkey sausages and hash browns. It was all pretty dammed good with the most expensive meal costing $9. You certainly get good bang for your buck in these parts. On the way out we noticed a piece of printed paper featuring an image of Reagan which said something to the effect of "During his reign the Lybians bombed our embassy, we struck back. For 25 years it was quiet, until someone apologised" Pretty much claiming the Lybians were behind the Trade Centre attacks and that if you are going to bomb anyone, don't say sorry. I suppose all them Mus-lims are all the same...

 We headed out to check out some of Lubbocks big name tourist attractions, namely the Buddy Holly museum. On arrival we found that pretty much everything is closed on a Monday, possibly something to do with the over represented 7th Day Adventist community.

Ooohh Wee Ooohh...

We met an older Australian couple who said they were heading to check out a Prarie Dog town at one of the local parks (provided the Prarie dogs wern't also a religious sect). Thankfully the Dogs were hard at work, doing whatever it is they do, which basically comprised of lazing around. Apparently they are very important animals as they are the only rodents that don't hibernate in winter and thus are the sole food source for predators. I'm not sure that would make me feel particularly important if I was a Prarie Dog, but good for them. They were pretty cute little critters and another 'exotic' animal sighting to add to our list.

After fully exhausting all of Lubbocks attractions it was time to get on the road to our last Texan overnight destination, Amarillo.

The drive was a continuation of what the Texan  landscape had been, oil pump jacks juxtaposed against the newer wave of energy production being wind turbines. We must have driven past 30,000 turbines in Northern Texas so far. About 30mins before arriving in Amarillo we pulled off the interstate at a town called Canyon to see, you guessed it, a canyon. The view was certainly worth the detour.

We took a self guided drive down into the canyon, stopping for burgers at a lonely food vendor in the valley floor. It has been abundantly clear that we have arrived after peak tourist season, which has been a blessing as we have barely had to deal with a queue anywhere we have been. This in combination with near perfect weather along the way has made the trip so much more enjoyable than it could have been in peak season.

We took 5 to relax a bit after a few long drives after checking in to yet another unremarkable roadside lodging. The evening had long been booked for a visit to the (in)famous Big Texan Steak Ranch, home of the 'Free' 72oz Steak. The challenge involves devouring a bread roll, baked potato, salad, 3 prawns (Shrimp for our American audience) and 2.1kg of prime Texan beef within a 1 hour time limit. I had high hopes of giving the steak challenge a go and had put in a bit of training back in Aus but it had become very clear that I sadly wasn't up to it.

When we arrived at the two storey gorge-house there were two challengers (read: victims) midway through their attempts. One guy looked to have plenty of experience hanging over his belt but the other was a young looking Aussie guy slowly masticating his way through an enourmous slab of cow. With about 5 minutes to go and pain etched on his face he moved onto the sides (got to eat those starches last). Looking like he could potentially take it out, his pace improved somehow hitting a 5th or maybe 6th wind. 3 minutes later though it was all over, the contents of his stomach errupting into the now obviously necessary tableside buckets. He was spotted about 10 minutes later tucking into a dessert. Keep it classy Australia.
Despite whimping out on the steak challenge we ordered a respectable combined 80oz of beef to satisfy any iron deficiency we may have still had. Some serious pieces of meat were being tossed around on the grill adjacent to our table, a sign of things to come. I must admit I was slightly daunted by the slab that was set down in front of me, at just over a kilogram it was the biggest piece of meat I've ever tried to put inside of me. I started off enthusiastically:

Attempting to mimic the style of the current 72 oz record holder (8 mins 52 sec) I began cutting slices and swallowing them down with minimal chewing. The meat was just too dammed tough to chew so I hit a brick wall when I ran out of beer and water. Despite employing more people than there were customers another glass was hard to come by and soon my jaw began to grow weary.

Pure Enjoyment

The 20 minute barrier came and went and my stomach began to register signals that it might be getting rather full. There was no turning back at this point though, I didn't want to seem like a pussy in my blog so I pushed on despite the above average levels of gristle and fat and finally success was had.

Yay

And aren't I happy about it. To be honest it was a sh!thouse steak but it was massive and I ate it.  My belt was well and truely breached. We took some photos of a bear and some cakes then we left with happy memories and meat sweats.